I am the salesperson 

I have sonic headphones

and my catch phrase is “wow I really need to get control of my life” 

wow I am the lamest doctor ever

Let’s try this again because my sonic underwear was a bit… unsanitary. 

I am The Teacher

I have a sonic iphone 

My catchphrase is “Oh I will”

I am the Researcher (he doesn’t really have an official title so eh)

I have a sonic pen

My catchphrase is ” You’ll see”  

I am the Bartender

I have a sonic lighter

My catchphrase is “Night babe”

I am the Professor

I have a sonic phone

My catchphrase is “I only notice when she started scratching at the door just now”

(how would that even become a catchphrase??)

I am The Professor

I have a sonic keyboard (maybe to attach to things in order to hack into them? cool beans!)

My catchphrase is “Good job!”

I am The Social Worker

I have sonic tweezers.

And my catchphrase is “Extra mushrooms!”

I am The Manager
I have a sonic iPhone
My catchphrase is “I love you too”

I am the jobless bitch

I have a sonic lamp

My catchphrase is “Oh shit”